I usually think of the song from Fiddler on the Roof when I use the word tradition. If you haven't seen the movie, stop what are doing and go watch it. It's moving, funny and possibly overwhelming. Okay, I'm not here for a movie review. I am here to ask you to consider creating or keeping tradition in your life. As I've gotten older (like we all get), my wife and I have embraced this idea of keeping and creating traditions for our family. There are several reasons, but the biggest is intentionality. So many things in our society are taken for granted and we just get into a habit of expecting it...wifi, internet, social media, texting, food in stores. Theses are things that other countries ma

Be careful who you text

Occasionally I will get a couple in my office that have a particular problem. I also happened to get an email about this problem so thought I would address it with a video. Let me briefly describe it. You or your partner go to work every week. During this time at work you start to become friends with a variety of people. You start connecting a bit more at work with someone of the opposite sex. You think, It's harmless of course, because it's at work. Work stays at work and home stays at home. You continue to share experiences at work and slowly this work relationship begins to encroach into your home life. When your partner makes comments and questions you, defensiveness sets in. Then you ha

Physical illness Vs. Mental illness

I meet with couples and families every week. One of the things that I often suggest is that they invite another "key player" into the room. It could be a husband, wife, Uncle or Grandparent. What I often hear in response to this invitation is " They would never come, they don't believe in therapy. I find it amusing when someone says they don't believe in something that actually exists. I do think there are a couple things it actually does mean when someone says this. It could mean they are fearful. It could mean they don't really know anything about therapy and don't want to. It could also mean that they are worried there is a stigma attached to it, "you know, only crazy people go to counsel